DEMOCRAT
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
You push for higher taxes so the government can provide cows for everyone.
REPUBLICAN
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?
SOCIALIST
You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.
COMMUNIST
You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk. You wait in line for hours to get it. It is expensive and sour.
CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows. You sell one, buy …

WHAT A BUZZ!!
Bud and Jim were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as aircraft mechanics in Philadelphia. One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do. Bud said, “Man, I wish we had something to drink!”
Jim says, “Me too. Y’know, I’ve heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz. You wanna try it?”
So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane hooch and get completely smashed. The next morning Bud wakes up and is surprised at …

INTERESTING OBSERVATION
1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL.
2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING.
3. The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL.
4. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL.
5. The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS.
And….
6. The sport of choice for corporate executives and officers is GOLF.
THE AMAZING CONCLUSION:
The higher you go in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
There must be a ton of people in Washington playing marbles!

When I bought my Blackberry, I thought about the 30-year business I ran with
1800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music, takes videos,
pictures and communicates with Facebook and Twitter. I signed up under
duress for Twitter and Facebook , so my seven kids, their spouses, 13
grandkids and 2 great grand kids could communicate with me in the modern
way. I figured I could handle something as simple as Twitter with only 140
ch aracters of space.
That was before one of my grandkids hooked me up for Tweeter, Tweetree,
Twhirl, Twitterfon, Tweetie and …

Crazy sea creatures left behind from the Tsunami.

Here are a few more funny pictures… Happy Friday!

Here are some funny photos I received today.  I hope they are a good laugh for you…

A woman’s husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several
months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day.
One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, ‘You know what? You
have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were
there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got
shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right
here. …

Here are a few classic photos to prove that these parents are the “best of the best” I sure hope you aren’t one of the children in the photo – or even worse… the parent!

Antisocial Farter:  One who excuses himself and farts in complete privacy.
Amiable Farter:  One who loves the smell of other peoples’ farts.
Athletic Farter:  One who farts at the slightest exertion.
Bruise Farter:  One who farts so hard and loud that he bruises his butt cheeks.
Dishonest Farter:  One who farts and then blames the dog or the kid.
Environmental Farter:  One who farts regularly but is truly concerned about air pollution.
Foolish Farter:  One who suppresses a fart for hours and hours.
Female (Dishonest) Farter:  They let you think they don’t fart until you marry them.
Honest …